This is an excerpt from the life of Ernestine Johnson. As I wrote this paragraph, I felt the fear and despair of a woman with a broken heart. A woman with no idea how to deal with the prospect of losing the man she loves and the life she knows. She sought comfort in a bottle of alcohol and drugs to soothe the grief that consumed her soul. I sympathized with Ernestine because as a young child, she had to survive the best way she knew how, but I also sympathized with her mother because she was lost in grief’s darkness. Ultimately, Ernestine became a desperate little girl struggling to save them both, and that struggle created a wounded and broken woman.
What we as women have to understand is that sometimes we have to ask for help. Over the years, those wounds may develop scabs, but the scars will continue to remind us that the pain is still real. That pain forces us to seek relief from whatever source is available. We seek that something to soothe that incessant ache of hopelessness, which allows us to feel less than. We seek that someone, that anyone to provide a sense of love and acceptance, which we believe will make us whole. It is easy to fall into an endless trap of abuse when we do not believe that we deserve better, and sometimes the pain of his fist against your face allows you to forget the persistent ache in your soul.
The one thing that I hope this book teaches us is that we are all human. We all experience life’s struggles and pains, and regardless of the color of our skin, or our economic and cultural disparity, we all bleed the same. What this book has taught me is that not everyone knows how to heal his or her wounds. They believe that when life happens, all you can do is live it the best way you know how, and they struggle through life attempting to conceal or bury the sorrow as forgotten memories in the back of their minds. However, that pain is relentless, and it will find a way to thrive. It becomes a leech embedded in the depths of your soul draining your senses of peace and happiness and leaving you to wallow in despair, depression, anger, and resentment until desperation forces you to confront the truth.
October is Domestic Violence Awareness month. Reach out to someone who may be trapped in an endless cycle of violence. Listen to their subtle pleas for help. Sometimes our judgment speaks louder than words, and we become deaf to our sister’s prayer. Be a friend, and remember that not everyone knows how to change his or her lemons into lemonade.
